Stronger…..

Next week, on the 2nd, it will be 7 months since I tore the tendon in my foot.  I can just now …..finally…… say that I’m feeling stronger.  Not stronger than I was before the injury but strong enough.  I’m strong enough to make the run for Ragnar FL Keys with a full 12 person team.  I’m strong enough to run at least one 10 mile “long” run every weekend.  I’m strong enough to run a few hills.  I’m strong enough to start pushing the pace when I have fresh legs.  I’m strong enough to start thinking about the future and how I will achieve new goals for 2013.  I’m strong enough to let go of the injury.  I’m strong enough to be confident in my rehab.  I’m strong enough to once again believe that dreams are possible.

Strong Enough Smart Enough Brave Enough

Part of the process for me was giving myself 100% to rehab.  I needed help and my foot wasn’t the only issue,.  It was just the result of a lot of other “little” things being neglected for so long.  I still rehab once a week, whether I should still call it rehab, I know not, but I go in to be tortured once a week.  My foot is still a major issue although, it generally only hurts now after a period of immobility.  Mornings are not good.

Another big part of recovery was/is about being honest.  Being honest with myself.   Being honest with Dr. Alexis even when it didn’t/doesn’t make her happy.  Being honest about the pain.  Being honest about what was working.  Being honest about what wasn’t working. 

honesty_ghandi

I also had to be brave and have blind faith in the rehab. 

Be Brave

I had to believe.  I had to believe that it would work.  I had to believe that the doc knew what she was doing.  I had to believe that I would run again.  I had to believe that the doc was on MY side and WANTED ME TO RUN AGAIN.  I had to believe.  believe-in-yourself

Fortunately, it’s easy for me to believe. Running has always been a part of me for as long as I can remember.  I had a few short years where I lost my way but that was a few years over the course of my entire life.  I am a runner.  Nobody can take that away.  It doesn’t matter if I run fast or slow.  I am a runner.  It doesn’t matter if I cast running to the side for a few years.  I am a runner.  It doesn’t matter if I’m injured or healthy.  I am a runner.  It doesn’t matter if I’m overweight or ideal weight.  I am a runner.  It doesn’t matter if I race or just lollygag on the trails for fun.  I am a runner.  There was never a doubt in my mind ……. I knew I would come back to run again.  I am a runner.  Nobody can take that away.

I’m stronger now.  Strong enough to run. 

** Amanda – TooTallFritz ** amanda@tootallfritz.com **

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9 thoughts on “Stronger…..

  1. This could be my favorite post so far. I am always inspired by what you write and intrigued by your thoughts. Especially when you discuss being a runner. I have “run” since 7th grade, I am now 47 and as I sit here this morning I am not sure I have ever considered myself a runner, I have just run. Your blog inspires me, pushes me and forces me to consider who I am just for me. Thanks

    • Thanks, Lisa. YOU are an inspiration to me! I just wish we lived closer together so that we could push each other daily!

      And you are definitely a runner. A real runner. The day your broke your foot in May, what were your thoughts? I know what they were, “Oh crap! How long before I can run again?”

  2. Nicely said TTF…deep and sincere. Running is an act of doing….being a runner is a state of being who you are, not matter what you believe, not matter how you think you look, irrespective of whenever you run…how much….or how far you run…or whatever reasons or rationale you may have to run….once you run and it becomes part of your life and being…you are a runner.

    Your thoughts on strength are timely…because it means you are gaining strength. Part of being an endurance runner is that concept of endurance. Not just how far, how fast and how long you can sustain the run….but how much you can endure in discomfort, anguish and sometimes physical pain. If we reflect on this past year….you definitely have endurance!

    Look forward to next year…it will be a far better one!

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