Stronger…..

Next week, on the 2nd, it will be 7 months since I tore the tendon in my foot.  I can just now …..finally…… say that I’m feeling stronger.  Not stronger than I was before the injury but strong enough.  I’m strong enough to make the run for Ragnar FL Keys with a full 12 person team.  I’m strong enough to run at least one 10 mile “long” run every weekend.  I’m strong enough to run a few hills.  I’m strong enough to start pushing the pace when I have fresh legs.  I’m strong enough to start thinking about the future and how I will achieve new goals for 2013.  I’m strong enough to let go of the injury.  I’m strong enough to be confident in my rehab.  I’m strong enough to once again believe that dreams are possible.

Strong Enough Smart Enough Brave Enough

Part of the process for me was giving myself 100% to rehab.  I needed help and my foot wasn’t the only issue,.  It was just the result of a lot of other “little” things being neglected for so long.  I still rehab once a week, whether I should still call it rehab, I know not, but I go in to be tortured once a week.  My foot is still a major issue although, it generally only hurts now after a period of immobility.  Mornings are not good.

Another big part of recovery was/is about being honest.  Being honest with myself.   Being honest with Dr. Alexis even when it didn’t/doesn’t make her happy.  Being honest about the pain.  Being honest about what was working.  Being honest about what wasn’t working. 

honesty_ghandi

I also had to be brave and have blind faith in the rehab. 

Be Brave

I had to believe.  I had to believe that it would work.  I had to believe that the doc knew what she was doing.  I had to believe that I would run again.  I had to believe that the doc was on MY side and WANTED ME TO RUN AGAIN.  I had to believe.  believe-in-yourself

Fortunately, it’s easy for me to believe. Running has always been a part of me for as long as I can remember.  I had a few short years where I lost my way but that was a few years over the course of my entire life.  I am a runner.  Nobody can take that away.  It doesn’t matter if I run fast or slow.  I am a runner.  It doesn’t matter if I cast running to the side for a few years.  I am a runner.  It doesn’t matter if I’m injured or healthy.  I am a runner.  It doesn’t matter if I’m overweight or ideal weight.  I am a runner.  It doesn’t matter if I race or just lollygag on the trails for fun.  I am a runner.  There was never a doubt in my mind ……. I knew I would come back to run again.  I am a runner.  Nobody can take that away.

I’m stronger now.  Strong enough to run. 

** Amanda – TooTallFritz ** amanda@tootallfritz.com **

I Refuse To Let The Grass Grow….

Ever heard anyone say, “Don’t let the grass grow under your feet”?  That’s exactly what a lot of people do when they become injured; however, it’s not my nature.  I’m “kinda” wired and I need to keep moving for the most part.  I’m very fortunate in that my injury still allows me to bike and swim.    So I bike and swim.  And bike and swim.

I have a little injury bike station set up.  I am not strong enough to ride outside at this point.  If I fall, particularly being clipped into my pedals, then my partial tear could become complete and who knows how much time off that would require.  So I’ll ride on the trainer until I feel comfortable and strong enough to take it outdoors. 

bike injury station

It’s actually kinda comfy.  I set it up facing the big screen tv, have a table for my water bottle, remotes, phone, etc.   I rode 10 miles yesterday morning at a slow pace since I wasn’t quite comfortable and my foot was a little achy.  Then today I went 30 miles, was feeling decent and was definitely faster.  Riding on the trainer is not the same as being outdoors but it’s good for now.  And safe.  And boring, like the dreadmill, thank goodness for the tv.

Me_bike_6-6-12

I also swam 1.2 miles this morning in the pool with Susan D.  She didn’t kick me.  She didn’t spit water in my face.  And she didn’t churn up so much water that I was scared.  Thanks Susan for being such a kind lane partner.  🙂  You’re definitely one of my favorites especially after you basically carried me back to my car last week when my ligament popped.  Thanks for that too!

My swim was much faster this morning (49 minutes vs 56).  No, I didn’t miscount.  No I didn’t cheat.  No Susan didn’t swim half of my 88 laps.  The difference? I didn’t feel like I was going to drown?   Firstly, my awesome friend, IronWOman Mel, told me last week that since my goggles keep fogging being that my antifog is 8 years old I should try using Johnson & Johnson baby shampoo.  Really?  Anyone tried this?  Since I literally stop a good 20-25 times while I swim to wipe the fog from my goggles, I decided to try it.  Damn, it worked too.  I rubbed a little undiluted J&J baby shampoo on my goggle lenses last night, rinsed, let air dry and today, I had exactly one fogging incident and that was my fault cuz I didn’t dip my goggles in the water before I started swimming.  Wow.  Best tip I’ve  had in a long time.  Thanks, Mel!

Secondly, I tried to focus on my kick the last 25ish laps.  I normally don’t kick at all much in the pool.  However, when I TRI, I start kicking as I come around the last buoy and can see the beach.  So I spend about a 1/3 of the swim with a solid kick (depending on how the buoys are set) and that kick makes a difference.  I don’t like to kick at the start, I just focus on being relaxed and enjoying the calm before the storm but when I come around the last buoy its game on and I’m ready to ride.  So today, I tried to focus on kicking in the last portion of my swim.  It’s GAME ON, bitches.   I’m so ready to TRI, it hurts.  I may be out of a few races but I refuse to end this season without a TRI or two in the books.  And watch out cuz, I’m gonna be lean and mean from my time off.  It’s not gonna be for fun……it’s gonna count and if i feel like this on day 6 of rehab, it’s gonna be scary when I come back after 12 weeks.  11 weeks and 1 day left.  #MakeItCount

** Happy Running & TRIing ** Amanda – TooTallFritz ** amanda@tootallfritz.com