The last three months have been even more difficult than what “normal” life brings on a daily basis. So many of my friends, acquaintances and even my own family has suffered the loss of very beloved family members, young and old alike. I’ve been to more funerals/wakes/memorials in the last 3 months than I have in the last 3 years. These things tend to be cyclical. We grieve and mourn together so we can comfort one another. It’s not fun but we are all in the same place and have an unspoken understanding of how difficult it is for one another. So many tears, so much sadness, so much pain.
Yesterday when the snow started falling, it was almost a relief. I was thankful to see the blanket of white cover the entire area. I was hopeful that the cold, blowing snow would somehow cover and maybe even numb our sadness.
I have hopes that as the snow melts, it will wash away at least some of the pain, refresh us and leave us with the happy memories of those we have lost.
I know that spring is near. I can feel it. As a springtime baby, I am in tune with the birds chirping, the geese flying overhead, the coyotes running and I know those spring flowers are just waiting. They are awaiting the perfect time to signal rebirth and renewal.
At times like this, I’m thankful to be a runner. Yes, my dogs ate my training plan (they ate my Run Less Run Faster book, wish I were joking but I’m not) but that doesn’t mean that I am lost. I now run to run. I run for peace. I run for solace. I run to remain focused so that sadness doesn’t overwhelm me.
I also find it ironic that for the first time ever, I signed up for a spring marathon. I’ve never had the desire to run one in the years past. I’ve never had the desire to battle what winter brings and still find a way to run long miles. I’ve never had the desire to enter flip flop season without toenails. For whatever reason, I did this year. And I’m thankful. Focusing on the miles, just enough miles to “finish it”, will get me thru all of this. It gives me focus when I need it most.
Thanks to my hubby for posting the above random pic on my FB wall. Source unknown.
Keep running, in whatever capacity you can manage. The winter, with whatever it has brought you, will come to an end soon. Let this last snow, cover and numb your woes. I personally will focus on happy memories and new beginnings with those who continue to stand beside me. I will NOT take those who remain for granted as I mourn those who are now at peace. I will focus on life, happiness, and love. Most importantly, I will focus on me and remember to love myself otherwise I will be empty and unable to lift up others when they are in need.
** Wishing You Peace & Happiness ** Amanda – TooTallFritz **