Reset to Happy Mode …..

Pretty much everyone I know is currently suffering some sort of Winter Depression.  Even those of us who normally manage to escape the seasonal disorder are just crabby and depressed.  I personally feel as if every day is a roller coaster and  I just can’t get my emotions stabilized.  I REALLY need some Vitamin D.  I really need to run outside.  I really need to be able to shove my kids out the backdoor and lock it to play.  I really need my hubby to start some sort of project outside the house to lift his own spirits.  I really need it to warm up and then, maybe, things will get back to some sort of normal.  Hopefully, because I just feel irrational.  For example, last week I got some news that really made me excited.  I felt like it was a big deal.  Now I’ve seen several other people got the same news.  Now I’m just depressed and somehow feel like I had no reason to be excited.  And that’s just stupid.

comparison

I’m also struggling with my own reality.  My schedule is packed with daycare drop offs/pick ups, a nasty commute back and forth to the city for work, the J.O.B. itself and family LIFE.  Nothing has really changed.  Okay, maybe a few things have changed but I’ve never been one to have much free time so I’m not sure why it’s bothering me now.  No I can’t do group runs anymore.  No I can’t go to any of the four computrainer classes where I’m being constantly invited (and even offered free sessions!).  No I can’t go to lunch cuz I’ll be at work.  No I can’t take that spin class.  No I can’t make the free swim clinic.  No I can’t go to that fundraiser.  No.  No.  No.  I honestly don’t have time and I’m not just saying that.  And I’m currently feeling a little sorry for myself, not because I feel as if I’m missing out but because my schedule just can’t accommodate all of the things that I want.  And that’s just stupid.

life is a gift

I think everything is kinda coming to a head this week because I’ve said NO to a lot of people over the last 5 days.  Plus I have gained weight and can’t fit into a lot of my clothes and I’m freaking out!  Plus it’s March and I’m ready to run fast and I’m too heavy to do that.  Or at least I WANT to run fast and the roads are covered with ice and snow.  My tune-up race for the Shamrock is tomorrow morning.  A local 5K.   The forecast is calling for cold and MORE SNOW.  Yes, I’m freaking out.  I’m afraid that I won’t be able to run fast and that the last couple months of speed and tempo training will be for nothing.  And I’m also scared to try to run fast if the roads are covered with snow and ice.  I don’t want to slip and fall.  I don’t want to be injured.  Dr. Alexis has been working super hard trying to keep my body up and running and injury free and I don’t want to ruin it by slipping on a patch of ice.  Yep, I’m a nervous wreck over the weather.  And that’s just stupid.

bad-weather-motivational-poster

So I’m taking a BIG DEEP BREATH.  I’m pushing the reset button. 

reset

I’m letting everything go.  I’m going to start focusing on the positive.  Like the fact that I’m healthy.  That my crazy amazing kids are healthy.  That I have a job.  That I actually have a few friends who want me to do things with them even if I can’t.  That the sun will eventually come out and melt this snow and ice.  Yes, I’m going to start focusing on the positive.

one small positive thought in the morn

Right now.  Join me.  Let’s all think about something positive and happy, RIGHT NOW.  And starting tomorrow morning, every day before I get out of bed, I’m going to take a moment to reflect and be positive and focus on the happy BEFORE I glance at the temperature gauge.  I can do this.  You can do this.  We can do this!

** Changing The Way WE Think ** Amanda – TooTallFritz **

Beyond Thankful…..

As we close out Thanksgiving for 2012, I look back at what the year has brought us.  It hasn’t been easy and I’ve wanted to jump off the roof to avoid the noise of screaming/fighting children multiple times but it always seems a little better in hindsight and I am always thankful.  I’m thankful for the health of our “little” ones.  I’m thankful hubby and I both have jobs.  I’m thankful hubby and I haven’t killed each other because of those little screaming/fighting angels in stressed out states of mind.  I’m thankful the holidays are upon us so that we can CELEBRATE the close of 2012  glory of the season.

For me, the best part of 2012 has been watching Aby come into her own as a runner.  Watching her on the Cross Country course, really running, in a strong way I had never seen before this year.  Watching her at races, as I trailed behind her knowing that forevermore, she will be the fastest runner in the house. 

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Running side by side with her on the trail and in weekend runs when she opted to stay with me rather than running ahead. 

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Taking her to races that she has never been able to run before because I now know that she can hold her own and is mature enough to handle real races and tough terrain. 

Aby_RFK Turkey Trot_2012

Watching her collect some serious hardware along the way.

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It really has been an amazing year!  The Thanksgiving Holiday brings most of us a 4 day weekend and plenty of time to reflect on the things for which we are thankful.  It is by far my favorite weekend of the year and the only one where I can expect 4 days off work in a row.  The only one we automatically know on which day of the week the holiday will fall.  Definitely the easiest one to plan and the easiest to set up annual traditions.  I’ve been trying to become more traditional over the last few years, trying to keep at least a few things the same from year to year in both family and life so that on occasion we can step away from the chaos for just a minute and KNOW what to expect. During a time where we are taught to expect the unexpected, it’s comforting to make, and then hang onto, a few traditions.

Which holiday is easiest for you?  Which holds the most “traditions” for you and your family?  More up on our Thanksgiving traditions tomorrow!

** Be Thankful ** Amanda – TooTallFritz ** amanda@tootallfritz.com