Reset to Happy Mode …..

Pretty much everyone I know is currently suffering some sort of Winter Depression.  Even those of us who normally manage to escape the seasonal disorder are just crabby and depressed.  I personally feel as if every day is a roller coaster and  I just can’t get my emotions stabilized.  I REALLY need some Vitamin D.  I really need to run outside.  I really need to be able to shove my kids out the backdoor and lock it to play.  I really need my hubby to start some sort of project outside the house to lift his own spirits.  I really need it to warm up and then, maybe, things will get back to some sort of normal.  Hopefully, because I just feel irrational.  For example, last week I got some news that really made me excited.  I felt like it was a big deal.  Now I’ve seen several other people got the same news.  Now I’m just depressed and somehow feel like I had no reason to be excited.  And that’s just stupid.

comparison

I’m also struggling with my own reality.  My schedule is packed with daycare drop offs/pick ups, a nasty commute back and forth to the city for work, the J.O.B. itself and family LIFE.  Nothing has really changed.  Okay, maybe a few things have changed but I’ve never been one to have much free time so I’m not sure why it’s bothering me now.  No I can’t do group runs anymore.  No I can’t go to any of the four computrainer classes where I’m being constantly invited (and even offered free sessions!).  No I can’t go to lunch cuz I’ll be at work.  No I can’t take that spin class.  No I can’t make the free swim clinic.  No I can’t go to that fundraiser.  No.  No.  No.  I honestly don’t have time and I’m not just saying that.  And I’m currently feeling a little sorry for myself, not because I feel as if I’m missing out but because my schedule just can’t accommodate all of the things that I want.  And that’s just stupid.

life is a gift

I think everything is kinda coming to a head this week because I’ve said NO to a lot of people over the last 5 days.  Plus I have gained weight and can’t fit into a lot of my clothes and I’m freaking out!  Plus it’s March and I’m ready to run fast and I’m too heavy to do that.  Or at least I WANT to run fast and the roads are covered with ice and snow.  My tune-up race for the Shamrock is tomorrow morning.  A local 5K.   The forecast is calling for cold and MORE SNOW.  Yes, I’m freaking out.  I’m afraid that I won’t be able to run fast and that the last couple months of speed and tempo training will be for nothing.  And I’m also scared to try to run fast if the roads are covered with snow and ice.  I don’t want to slip and fall.  I don’t want to be injured.  Dr. Alexis has been working super hard trying to keep my body up and running and injury free and I don’t want to ruin it by slipping on a patch of ice.  Yep, I’m a nervous wreck over the weather.  And that’s just stupid.

bad-weather-motivational-poster

So I’m taking a BIG DEEP BREATH.  I’m pushing the reset button. 

reset

I’m letting everything go.  I’m going to start focusing on the positive.  Like the fact that I’m healthy.  That my crazy amazing kids are healthy.  That I have a job.  That I actually have a few friends who want me to do things with them even if I can’t.  That the sun will eventually come out and melt this snow and ice.  Yes, I’m going to start focusing on the positive.

one small positive thought in the morn

Right now.  Join me.  Let’s all think about something positive and happy, RIGHT NOW.  And starting tomorrow morning, every day before I get out of bed, I’m going to take a moment to reflect and be positive and focus on the happy BEFORE I glance at the temperature gauge.  I can do this.  You can do this.  We can do this!

** Changing The Way WE Think ** Amanda – TooTallFritz **

2012 …… In Review

Seven days out from Christmas and I’m in disbelief that the year is almost gone.  Most of the time at year end, as I’m sitting in this position looking back, I’m able to take pride in the goals set and attained.  Not so much this year.  I struggled to build back up after some time off at the end of 2011 (a failed attempt to clear the plantar fasciitis).  Then I tore the tendon in my foot at the beginning of summer.  I will not run 1000 miles this year.  I did not run a 1:50 half marathon which I thought was an absolute no brainer.  I did not break 6:30 for a half iron event which I also thought was a no brainer.  I did not complete even one triathlon.  I did not run a marathon.  I did not maintain my weight.  I did not do a lot of things that I had thought were so very possible at the beginning of 2012.  But alas, it wasn’t a bad year. 

Occasionally, we just need to “let go” of our goals and go with the flow.   Some things are absolutely beyond our control.   You know the difference between being lazy and not making it happen verses life/injury got in the way and derailed the plans.  So if your life, or God’s plan for your life, got in the way this year and you DID NOT #MakeItHappen, then please take a minute, right now, and let it go.  Next year is another year.   The point of making goals is to constantly challenge oneself and be the best person that you can be at any given time.  Sometimes, the best we have at a given moment is sitting in the rocker ….. rocking our sick child.  Or icing an injured foot over a cold Corona Light.

So as I look back, I do not see failure but instead I look at the positive things that I did accomplish.

I got a photo with THE Green Men at the Shamrock Shuffle this year!  Major accomplishment!  Expect to see this photo several times a year from now til eternity.  I’m VERY proud!  (Nicole F, me, Green Man #1, Maggie, Green Man #2, & Kelly)

Nicole-Me- Green Men_Maggie_Kelly

I raced my first relay event with my “baby” girl, Aby.  Tinley Park Duathlon where my “baby” OFFERED to run for me so that I could still participate even though I was still very early in the injury stage and couldn’t even walk without a limp.

tinleydu_12_meaby

I watched that same baby girl become not just her own person but a really FAST runner.

Monster Dash_2012_Aby &Me beginning

I managed to keep my crazy lil man safe “enough” to make it through 2012.

Mattessien State Park_kids on trail_Aug 2012

I’m still married. (This will be the only time that you will see me in a bikini…..only photo I have of hubs & I from 2012 and I may delete this section before I actually publish).

Mick & I_july 4 2012

So 2012 was not only a good year but a great one!  I encourage you to focus on the positive and do your damndest to make 2013 EVEN better.  We only live once.  Make it count.

** Cheers to Making It Count **  Amanda – TooTallFritz **